Getting Social ... Life in Cohousing

And fools rush in...

Ever since I wrote about community work, I've been wanting to share about community fun — all those events that happen here, ad-hoc and organized, big and small, regularly and one-time.

There are only a couple of community-organized events... the annual holiday auction (raising money for charity), two talent shows (one on the night of the auction and one in the spring), and a camping trip or two. I think that's it! None of which are required.

Here are some of the activities we've attended or participated in since we moved in seven months ago:

• Pumpkin carving party and group trick-or-treating.

• Holiday auction and talent show.

• New Year's Eve fancy dinner (cooked by ourselves), games, and a big bonfire.

• The Annual New Year's Day Polar Bear Plunge, aka dashing into the freezing cold Pacific Ocean together and then huddling around a fire (see above).

• Fancy Valentine's dinner.

• A talk given by a visiting professor, about her research on intentional communities in Australia, the UK, and the Netherlands (she contacted us on her way through Seattle).

• A graduation party for a twenty-three-year-old college graduate. At his party, his parents stood up and spoke about how much they appreciated cohousing for how it helped them as parents and to make Jules the man he was today. Folks shared many stories about the gaggle of kids who preceded the current gaggle of kids. It was amazing to think that some day my boys might be standing there as young men!

• Easter egg dying party and egg hunt.

• Seder dinner. Our first! Orlando loved the ritual and the stories.

• A memorial service for a long-time deeply beloved community member.

• Story night, where people shared stories from throughout the history of the community. (We're recording them for posterity and for our upcoming 20-year anniversary.)

One of my favorite events was the talent show. I have one word to describe it: Fun!

The one we attended last winter featured a neighbor reading her poetry, a three-year-old balancing on a chair, a family singing a goofy song that involved wordplay and animal costumes, an older gentleman reading BLAH BLAH, a bubble-gum blowing contest, and more.

And the Holiday auction is brilliant. It began many years ago and has evolved into almost everything offered being a service to one another. Items this year included a paddle-board lesson, a home-cooked Greek dinner for four, storage space in someone's deep freezer, two hours of handy-person work, a girls' night out, pizza made by two young brothers, a tea party for the little kids, and more. A wonderful way to raise money, build community, and have fun.

See?

Fun! :-)

Regular events hosted by individuals include...

• a weekly sitting meditation in the common house on Saturday mornings.

• monthly meaningful movies — recent showings have been The Economics of Happiness, I Bring What I Love, and A Fierce Light. We invite members of a neighboring cohousing community and our nearby neighbors with time for a discussion after the movie.

• nightly saying of the kaddish (the Jewish prayer of mourning), for a beloved elderly community member who passed away this year. This is led by his son, who also lives here.

There are also additional movies that aren't part of the meaningful movies series. Last week someone showed An Inside Job and this week someone showed Women of Tibet in honor of Mother's Day.

On top of all that activity, there are private events that happen regularly in our common house, hosted by a member who lives here:

• a parenting book group

• a men's group

• the local Democrats

And in between anything planned, there are things like this:

Last Sunday I was busy inside cleaning up (guests coming over) and the kids were outside, running around. I went out to check on them and found them in the field near the tree house, with one of the dads sitting on a picnic table, playing his guitar while a group of kids swung and climbed all over the hammock. I had brought a bag of crackers, and another dad said, "Oh, good! We need more snacks." I added them to the quesadillas and apple slices already on the table.

I sat down in the sun and smiled.